Ironing out the wrinkles

Bugger. You would think that, in mid-July, I would be quite comfortable in a short-sleeved shirt. Having said that, you would think that I had the sense to keep a fleece or light waterproof in the car 'just in case'. 
It's not particularly cold or wet, but, compared to the tourists in their coats, fleeces and goretex jackets, I feel very under-dressed. 
No test centre in Ullapool so, once again, I go for a walk, or find a cafe, when my pupils are out on test - and I have six consecutive tests today. 
It is quite a unique situation in these remote test centres. In Inverness and Elgin I occasionally get 2, or even 3, tests on the same day. It is unlikely that test candidates will know the other pupils talking their test and they nearly always get an hour's lesson prior to their test. In Ullapool however, the only pupils I can guarantee an hour's lesson before their test are the ones that book the first test of the day, or the one immediately after lunch. For the others, as is the case today, they have to meet me at the Fire Station (where the test begins and ends) and, if we are lucky, they will get a ten/fifteen minute 'warm-up' drive before their test. Then, after their test, they are often left to make their own way home as I will invariably have another pupil waiting for their warm up drive. Sometimes test days can feel a bit like a conveyor belt.

The other thing is that most of my Ullapool pupils know each other so, not only do they get anxious about their own tests, but they can sometimes worry about their friends' too. Last month, a pupil taking the last test of the day asked "How has everyone else got on today?"

"Would it help if I told you they all passed or they all failed?" I replied.

"No, you're right. I don't want to know."

Another thing is that, as much as I am confident that they should all pass, it is natural that I will be more confident in some rather than others. And it is often down to how much they have put into it themselves. As much as I try to make them as good a driver as possible, you can often get pupils who reach a good standard in relatively few hours. The problem with that is that I have less time to see how they deal with various situations. If then, during the test (or worse, after they have passed their test), a situation arises that they don't know how to deal with, then they could be in trouble. In theory, if they apply their knowledge to any situation, they should be fine, but you just never know for certain. I have had pupils who, on their test, have had to drive along a pavement to get around a lorry that was unloading. Or have had to reverse back along a narrow road from a T-junction because a lorry had blindly swung into the junction without checking into the road first. Both pupils passed, but nothing like that ever occurred during their lessons.

So, as a pupil approaches their test, I like to try to engineer situations that are going to be difficult for them. My philosophy is that, if they can deal with really difficult junctions/situations, then 99.9% of driving (and, hopefully, the driving test) will be really easy in comparison. I am trying to iron out all possible wrinkles, or polish them to perfection.

Unfortunately, sometimes a wrinkle unexpectedly occurs. My first test pupil of the day was someone who I struggled to find any fault in her driving. The photo on the right is of West Terrace, Ullapool. The 'pavement' is the area between the wall/fence and the white line. For the purpose of a turn in the road, the examiner is quite happy for the pupil to cross the white line, but, otherwise, it should be considered as a pavement. In her test, my pupil was driving on the other side of the road (towards us, as far as this photo is concerned), with numerous parked cars on her side. Another car, approaching her from ahead, had already starting encroaching on the 'pavement', to give both cars as much room as possible. My pupil should have pulled in to the left slightly and waited behind a parked car, to enable to the oncoming car to return to the correct side of the white line. But, because the oncoming car had already made room for her, she continued. And failed as a result. The ironic thing, as far as she is concerned, is that her awareness of 'meeting traffic' situations is usually perfect, so it was the last thing I would have expected her to fail on.

Later in the day, I had a pupil who had got through her teens and early twenties without learning to drive. It was only when one of her younger sisters (who had passed with me last year) bought her a voucher for driving lessons, that she decided to take the plunge. Her lessons have been quite concentrated, over a period of a few weeks and I think it was the short time span that made her doubt her ability to drive. After all, it was only a couple of months ago that she had not driven at all. So, in the run up to her test, she was having lessons almost every day. To try to eliminate her doubts I tried to work on any problem that occurred, making the 'wrinkles' smaller and fewer, until, a week before her test, it got to the point where I struggled to find a single fault in her driving. And this is by far the best way to combat pre-test nerves. Some people try various (legal) drugs, one person even tried hypnotism, but the best way is to develop your driving to the point where you KNOW you can drive, and can drive well. 

She became one of those pupils who, last week, I thought could be my first pupil to pass with no minor faults. I have now had several pass with just one minor fault/driver error, but the perfect pass had so far eluded us. Apparently, less than one in ten thousand pass with zero faults, but I do get pupils who I think "They could be 'the one'." As it turned out, she did pick up 3 minor faults, but, in a test situation, that is fantastic. So, very well done Catherine - you and Alasdair (her boyfriend, who passed with me in Inverness last month) can now have a private contest to see who is the better driver.

The rest of the tests went equally well. Piotr had failed a couple of times with a previous instructor, which didn't help the nerves, but also passed with 3 minor errors. Bethany, Erin and Olivia were all taking their test for the first time and made me very proud by all passing with just 3 - 5 minor errors. Congratulations to all five of you.

A few days earlier, Aaron took his driving test in Inverness. He had booked a block of twenty hours and his parents helped by giving him extra practice. In the latter lessons we worked hard on any weakness in his driving. He had developed his control of the car early on, but we needed to work on awareness and planning. By the day of his test I was very confident for him and was slightly surprised when he asked if I could sit in on the test. As the test progressed I couldn't find anything I could fault him for - so far. I was unusually relaxed - sitting in on a test is not usually a relaxing experience - and, as we approached Inverness test centre, I was thinking of what a good drive it had been. I knew he had passed, and the examiner confirmed it when he praised him on such a nice drive. But it still caught me by surprise when he said "I'm pleased to tell you that you have passed - and with no driver errors." !!!! We had done it! Or, more correctly, Aaron had done it. Aaron had joined that very exclusive club of a faultless drive in a test. 

I won't stop there. I'll try to get every pupil passing with 0 driver faults. It won't happen, of course, but it is a good target to aim for.

It is not just a target for me. Passing the driving test is really just the minimum standard. Everyone should always try to think of ways of improving their driving. Aaron has already asked about taking the Pass Plus course, and Catherine has already booked her Pass Plus course for next week. If they are looking to improve their driving, despite only having 3 minor errors between them, then it should serve as a lesson for everyone else.

Blinded by the light

I'm not a sunglasses person. I feel stupid trying them on in front of those greased up mirrors on the display rack and I never seem to find any that are in any way flattering. And if I do they will certainly be some stupid price. So those deepening lines around my eyes are caused by years of squinting. When driving, however, I don't care how ridiculous I look, I just buy a cheap pair of sunglasses that will eliminate most of the glare and keep them in my car. Now whereas most people would associate sunglasses with the 'Summer', when driving, they become more useful as the days get shorter and the sun gets lower. The glare (and danger) is amplified in the mornings/evenings when the road is wet (or icy or snowy) as my 8.00am pupil found out this morning; as she rounded a corner the sudden glare from the sun and the wet road temporarily blinded her and I had to take the wheel to ensure she kept to our side of the road.
As always, when driving, look well ahead and, if you see the road ahead (especially after a bend) is brightly lit, anticipate the effect on your vision the sunlight will have and adjust your speed as appropriate. Better still, ignore the fact that you will look like some Z-list celebrity and wear effective sunglasses when there is a sharp contrast in light.
We may not have reached the temperatures of more southerly parts of Britain recently, but it has been nice to have the windows open again, and even the air-con on, though I wouldn't necessarily agree with some of my pupils complaining that it has been 'roastin''.
 Just typical! A while back I treated myself to a decent camera after being frustrated with seeing fantastic scenes and only having the pathetic camera on my phone with me. The other morning I awoke to see some very weird and wonderful cloudscapes but, annoyingly, I had left my camera in the car, so the photo (taken with my phone) doesn't do justice to that amazing sky.
While I'm still on the subject of the weather, anyone who has passed their test this year and still not taken the Pass Plus course may want to consider doing so over the next few months. The weather will deteriorate and taking the course will give you more knowledge and confidence if you have to drive in the snow and ice. And it's not just about driving in bad weather; we'll look at night driving, dual carriageways, motorways, rural roads and typical features of town and city roads (such as roundabouts), then you can focus on whatever aspect you feel least confident on.
Also, the Highland Council have recently increased their grant for anyone wishing to take the course so it may be that taking the course will not cost you a penny. There is no test involved and many insurers offer discounts to drivers who have taken the course. You don't even have to have had lessons with me - it could be that your driving instructor wasn't qualified to conduct the Pass Plus course. Call me on 07577 718727 if you are interested.
Finally, Blogger.com, who host this site, have been tinkering with the format and suggested I try out their new interface. I'll give it a try but I'm not too sure. Let me know what you think. Stick with it or go back to the old format? 

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction

Life is determined not to be straightforward.
On Monday Jane and I flew back from Luton to Inverness. The weather reports were not good; extremely strong winds were hammering the north of Britain and we were concerned that our flight would be cancelled. Then, there followed news about another Icelandic volcano also threatening the operation of flights. Our flight was ok, if a little bumpy, but subsequent flights were cancelled.
Yesterday morning I had a six-hour Pass Plus course with James, who passed with about six weeks ago. A very nice driver, he only picked up two driving faults on his test, but he has had had little experience on dual-carriageways and, with the Highland Council helping with a grant, it made sense to undertake the course.
Inverness was getting busy with Saturday shoppers and we approached the Millburn Road dual-carriageway from Diriebught Road, intending to turn right. The road was busy in both directions, but James was able to cross the first lane and wait in the central reservation. It seemed as though we would have to wait some time for a gap in the traffic approaching from our left but we were surprised when an oncoming bus began slowing and flashing his lights. His intention was clearly to let James out. Very nice of him but it was a decision we would all regret.

If you think back to your maths and physics lessons, you may vaguely remember something about Newton's Laws of Motion. I can't remember which is which, but I remember doing lots of sums concerning 'a body of mass, m, subject to a net force, F, undergoes an acceleration, a, that has the same direction as the force and a magnitude that is directly proportional to the force and inversely proportional to the mass, i.e. F=ma. One of the other laws states that a body at rest will remain at rest until acted upon by an external force. When you are at school and the teacher writes this on whatever they use instead of blackboards these day it can initially make you think "?!?!?!". However, in practice, it becomes very clear.
For example: When my car is at rest and is hit by an accelerating bus weighing up to 18,000kg (with passengers), we can apply the formula F=ma, and calculate that the force was effing horrendous.

After the bus let us out, James drove up to the Raigmore Interchange, a big, fast roundabout beneath the A9. He was looking for gaps in the traffic as he approached, but ultimately had to stop and wait. Waiting for a gap at a junction can be streesful even for a more experienced driver, but I always reassure my pupils, telling them not to take chances and wait for a clear gap. Of course, this is not made any easier by the facts that half the drivers on the roundabout are not indicating correctly or are even in the wrong lane. And there is a big bus behind us.
After about a minute, I can see a gap in the approaching traffic. This is a Pass Plus, so I expect James to see this too. He sees the gap, but is slightly hesitant in moving off. WHAM! One instant I am looking at the traffic, making sure it is still safe for James to accelerate, the next thing I know, there is an almighty bang, glass shatters and I am aware of the fact that, for a split second, I am now looking at the interior roof of the car as my head gets thrown back (yes, my head restraint was correctly positioned). Momentum throws us forward and the noise of traffic has increased because the rear window has completely shattered.

I checked that James was ok and asked him to sit in the back of the car while I get out and have a little chat with the bus driver. I actually felt a little bit sorry for him because he had been kind enough to let us out into the traffic (although, with hindsight, I wish he hadn't). His main concern was that he might lose his job. Because he was carrying passengers, it was his obligation to call the police (who were very prompt) and their main priority was obviously to get us moved away from the roundabout as soon as possible. The bus driver asked me to agree that he had given me plenty of room. "Yes....to start with, you did." I replied. He then explained that he thought my pupil was moving off faster than he actually did. There was no question that, regardless how quickly James was moving off, the bus driver was 100% in the wrong (and I had to keep reassuring James about that). Once we had swapped details, and the police were satisfied with what had happened, I drove away.

Luckily, the car was still ok to drive, although it was amazing how much damage a bus could do from a standing start, but I had to pull over when I could to clear as much shattered glass as possible. James comes from Durness, 105 miles and over two hours away. So doing his Pass Plus all in one 6-hour session made sense. I was pleased to hear that, although we would obviously have to end that session prematurely, he was keen to return in the next couple of weeks to complete the course.
Once I finally arrived home I was straight on the phone to my insurance company. Typically, because it was now Saturday afternoon, it was outside of office hours and, although someone was there to register my claim, she could make no promises about how quickly things could be resolved - especially as it was a bank holiday weekend.
So here I sit: No car and three, maybe four days of lessons cancelled. This is particularly frustrating as I had a new pupil scheduled on Saturday afternoon and, even though it is not my fault, it still feels slightly uncomfortable telling a new pupil that my car had been involved in an accident. Many thanks to friends and family who have offered to lend me their cars, but it is in my pupils' best interests if I just postpone their lessons.
I'm beginning to wish that that volcano had erupted a day earlier and our flights had been cancelled after all.

Died and gone to heaven

Did you know, and not a lot of people know this, that, when you die, the afterlife is much more ordered and planned than real life. All your earthly experiences are re-lived, but grouped into similar categories. For example, you will spend approximately 20 – 25 continuous years sleeping. You will spend about 3 – 4 years doing nothing but eating and another couple of years drinking. You will spend maybe a year lying on a beach and all your sexual experiences will be continuous. This all sounds great but there is a downside: You will suffer all your pain at once; for 27 hours you will do nothing but cut yourself, break bones and worse. You will endure over five months sat on a toilet. Plus there is the boredom too; day after day of waiting in airport terminals, fifteen months searching for lost items and perhaps even longer wondering where other drivers are going (because they are not indicating).

Sadly, I’m not the person who created this idea of the afterlife. It is pinched (and tweaked) from “Sum: Forty Tales from the Afterlives” by David Eagleman. I'm beginning to wonder if I am already in the afterlife (or, that particular version of it), things seem to be either very good, or very bad. After a period of relative dolce vita, endless consecutive test passes (well, eight), good weather and general plain sailing, I then had a particularly unpleasant week; lesson cancellations, rubbish weather, bursting tyres, lost debit cards, crashing computers and a pupil failing their test after making a pig's ear of their reversing manoeuvre. The roads seemed less safe too; whilst one of my Nairn pupils was driving to Inverness one morning - keeping up with the flow of traffic at a nice, steady 60mph - a complete prat in a red VW Golf (SX03EEW) thought it would be a good idea to overtake us as we approached a right-hand bend. When an oncoming car came around that bend he/she was forced to brake sharply and swerve violently back in front of us, avoiding the ditch by a matter of nanometres. The 'Baby on board' sign, restricting their vision, only added to my despair.

Then, last Wednesday, the clouds lifted, the temperature started creeping into the twenties, the sun shone and life, in general, improved...

A few weeks earlier one of my pupils had bizarrely not shown up for his driving test. I had tried calling and texting him, but without reply. Very strange. It turned out he had been rushed to hospital that morning with lung problems, so the driving test was far from being his priority. Last week he called me to explain and to say that he had re-booked his test in Alness (he didn't want to wait for an Inverness test). Could I help? (he had given me two days’ notice). Luckily (and thank you to my obliging pupils), I was able to reschedule a few lessons and we were on for Alness. I used to teach in the Alness/Invergordon area when I lived in Glen Urquhart, but had not taught (or even been near the place) for over three years. We only had an hour to have a quick look around the area, but it should not matter if they don't know the area, if he just applies what he had learned in Nairn/Inverness, there should be no problem. And so it proved, so congratulations to Norman on passing first-time (sort of).

My computer then made a miraculous recovery. The computer engineer had told me that it was beyond repair and I would have to replace it. I'm not sufficiently skilled in computer repair to quibble, but I undertook the complex procedure of turning it off, leaving it to fester for a few days, then turning it back on again, and that has seemed to fix the problem.

A new debit card was received, I had three enjoyable days of pupils taking their Pass Plus course, Jane and I enjoyed an overdue horse ride in Darnaway Forest, Liverpool (and Andy Carroll) sprang to life (against Manchester City), some pupils paid for blocks of lessons and, to top it all off, the four new pupils who had their first lessons booked this week all turned up!

In the chapter referred to in David Eagleman’s book, he concludes by suggesting that, in this version of the afterlife, you covet a more earthly life where experiences are split into smaller swallowable pieces, where one enjoys jumping from one emotion to the next. I have to agree, imagine supporting a football team who win everything in sight for two decades, then nothing for the next two decades..... Oops! Forget that last comment.