Friday, 8 June 2012

Red, white & bloom

I caught some of the (slightly excessive) coverage of the Jubilee. I'm not the most patriotic person, but I'm always in favour of seeing hundreds of thousands of people enjoying themselves. Just a shame that the weather made everything look reddish-grey, grey and greyish-blue.
As far as the weather was concerned, it was the opposite here. And this coincided with the Highlands at perhaps their most colourful. In addition to the usual blues and greens, the scenery is awash with splashes of almost every other colour imaginable.
The trouble is, I am useless at remembering plant names. I know that the yellows are Gorse, Broom and Laburnum, and I think lots of the mauve stuff is Rhododendron, or is it Azalea? And the green bits are definitely grass.
No, botany is not my bag. Jane knows it. She puts loads of time and effort into our garden and tries to educate me in these matters, but, for some reason, I find it hard to absorb all this knowledge she has. Ask me what was the b-side of Tommy Gun by The Clash? In which geological period was Portland stone formed? Which 1975 film won the 5 major Oscars? What is the formula for calculating the volume of a sphere? What is the capital of Bhutan? Who scored the winning goal in the 1971 FA Cup final? Twin Peaks centered on whose murder? And (hopefully) which is the only circular British road sign with three arrows on it? I could answer all of these for you. But ask me what a Begonia looks like and I wouldn't have a clue.
I often join one of the teams in the weekly quiz at The Argyll, Ullapool, where, fortunately, there are very few gardening questions. In the last couple of months the quiz has had an extra frisson of competitiveness because, in addition to the usual prize (a pizza), the top team over a period of 8 weeks will go forth to some quiz final in Edinburgh in August. We had a sticky couple of weeks, where The Pact, a team of schoolteachers, beat us, but, overall, we, Way out West, qualified to represent Ullapool in the capital. I shall keep you informed of our progress.
Many locals pretend to eschew the Queen and the Jubilee but, in last night's quiz, the highest scoring round for most teams was...... The Jubilee. I did have one panicky moment when the questionmaster asked 'Who has recently appointed as the manager of Liverpool FC?' Everyone on the team turned to me (Liverpool are my team), but I had a mental block and I couldn't think! Luckily, it came to me before the end of the round. At the moment, the name Brendan Rogers doesn't have the same resonance as Shankly, Paisley, Dalglish, or even Benitez, so perhaps I could be forgiven.

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