quid pro quo

....and, as I have started with some Latin, here are some more words for you: Luxuria, Gula, Avaritia, Acedia, Ira, Invidia, Superbia or, as you might know them better, Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy and Pride. As you may know, the Catholic Church divided sin into two principal catagories: Venial sins are relatively minor - a bit like gently touching the curb during a manoeuvre - while Cardinal (or Mortal) sins are very naughty and are believed to 'destroy the life of grace and create the threat of eternal damnation unless either absolved through the sacrament of Penance or forgiven through perfect contrition on the part of the penitent'. I guess I'm bound for eternal damnation then, as I rather partial to one or two of those cardinal sins from time to time. Pride (or hubris) is considered to be the original, and the most serious, sin. It was Lucifer's pride (his desire to compete with God) that caused his fall from heaven, and his resultant transformation into Satan. Not all driving instructors will tell you this important information. However - and this is where Gordon Gekko and I disagree - I think greed is the worst. Gordon Gekko thought that "Greed is good" and "lunch is for wimps" and the Catholic Church thinks it is ok to abuse children, so don't listen to them.

Yesterday, after nine hours of lessons in Ullapool, I decided to stay overnight in the village, rather than drive home then drive back again today. I hadn't planned ahead and was disappointed to find that my usual B&B had no vacancies. This seemed to be the case with many of the B&Bs close to the shore, so I thought it best to find one in one of the back streets away from the main tourist area. I found one hidden away, with a 'vacancies' sign dispayed. Perfect. I knocked on the door.
"Do you have a single room available?"
She looked me up and down (I was smartly dressed, with black trousers, white shirt and tie), "I've got a room with 3 single beds."
"Ok. How much is that?"
"It depends how desperate you are."
In other words, she had no intention of letting me have the room at the rate per person advertised.
"I'm not desperate. There is a hostel around the corner." I replied.
It was tempting to add  "....so don't think about trying to fleece me, you money-grabbing greedy hag.", but I kept that thought to myself.
Maybe she was a mystical hag and was able to read my thoughts because she said "Well, you'd better try the hostel then." as she closed the door on me. I was quite shocked by this. I perfectly understand her wanting to get the best return on her room, but it was nearly eight o'clock and I doubt that anyone else would have been looking for a B&B so far from the main area at that time of night. I was quite happy to go to the hostel, where the rooms are basic, but clean, but I remained disappointed by the landlady's attitude - she had not even considered suggesting a price to me - it was so unlike the attitude of most people in the Highlands; greed is alien to them.

I am not the most materialistic person in the world (sometimes I take this to extremes which makes Jane despair). In fact, money almost repels me. But then I seem to repel money, so that's fair. Perhaps that is why I like the fact that many transactions are completed here without a sniff of money.
Irene, our neighbour, regularly leaves a bag of her home-grown tomatoes, or a cake that she has made, on our doorstep, while Jane will look after Irene's garden (or bake a cake) in return. Jane will let her friend, Eve, ride Dave (one of our ponies) and, in return, Eve keeps us supplied with eggs from her hens and buckets of fruit and chantelle mushrooms from her neighbouring woods. Bob 'gives up' his Thursday evenings to host the pub quiz in return for the odd drink or five. And I have traded driving lessons (or discounts on) for meals from a customer's chinese takeaway, B&B, home-made ginger and lime cakes and some mechanical work on Jane's car. This week, a recently-passed pupil recommended me to her boss, who owns an hotel. He then called me and we have just negotiated a deal where I teach his wife to drive, and in return, I get free bed, breakfast and evening meals in the hotel whenever I want to stay in Ullapool (which will be once or twice a week). He's pleased and I'm very pleased, especially considering last night's encounter with the greedy landlady.

This idea of 'you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours' applies to my relationship with pupils. On the whole, they are enthusiastic and considerate people. If they ever have to cancel, or postpone a lesson, they generally try to give me at least two day's notice. Then, I may be able to fill that gap with a lesson for someone else. It is BSM's (and many other driving schools') policy to charge for the lesson if less than 48 hours notice is not given before a cancellation. I'm generally too soft to ever charge someone if they cancel with short notice, although I find that sometimes a pupil will offer to pay anyway. Sometimes a cancellation cannot be helped; an injury or illness, or even the pupil's boss insisting they work that day, are reasonable reasons for a cancellation. I would much rather a pupil is honest. If they call me and say 'Sorry Martin, I don't think I can afford a lesson this week', I would prefer that to a dishonest text message on the day. I can usually tell which pupils are mucking me about and which ones are genuine. The genuine, considerate pupils I reward with as much flexibility as I can in fitting in their lessons. If I think someone is not being considerate, or honest, I will then dictate when they have their lessons. If they don't like it, tough.

So whether it is swapping some delicious mushrooms for a horseride, being considerate to your driving instructor/pupil, letting the occasional car out of a side road when traffic flow is slow, or being willing to enter into negotiations when someone wants to stay in your B&B, life is much better with a little give and take.